To fail and to fail often

Seth Godin has another fine post on his blog. This one is strikingly relevant for me right now. He spends the first 90% of the page reminding us how lucky we all are (assuming we're Americans) to live where we do, when we do, and he's absolutely right. Good people have gone before us and made amazing things possible. But then Godin changes gears and becomes exactly what I needed to hear.

Not that the rest of his post wasn't food for thought. No, it's just that the end sounded like he was talking to me. Here's the last line of his post: "The object isn’t to be perfect. The goal isn’t to hold back until you’ve created something beyond reproach. I believe the opposite is true. Our birthright is to fail and to fail often, but to fail in search of something bigger than we can imagine. To do anything else is to waste it all." Those words, "something bigger than we can imagine," are luxurious, hopeful, stuffed with faith and eagerness. But this is the part that caught me: "to fail and to fail often."

I recently experienced a deeply significant failure. I didn't get that perfect job. No, seriously, this was the perfect job. I've never felt that way about an employment opportunity before. On most days the only thing that will satisfy my questing heart would be the ability to build my story-culture and get paid for it. But this opportunity seemed like the missing link, that rare situation that would pay my bills (pay them well) provide for all my needs, call upon all my talents, and share boundaries with my dream at the same time.

I was really disappointed.

But a day after getting the news, I'm hopeful again, and stronger, and more than ever I know what I want. Knowing what you want is something you can never learn from getting what you want. You have to fail. You have to draw near to the golden ring and then miss. If you're watching you'll come away with a memory not of the missed chance, but of what it was in that chance that drew you. Your vision of what you want for yourself will become clearer.

To fail and fail often. Yes, that's really how it is. This is not the first time I've failed in this quest I'm on. But each time I fail I find myself more capable than ever of achieving the dream. Yes, it can be maddening, but it's true. What isn't true is that "I was never meant to work there or it would have happened." It's also not true that "the right thing is still out there waiting." What is true is that the right thing now exists when it did not exist before. It exists a little more because of this failure. I hope I don't need to fail anymore, but maybe I do. I hope that if I do, I'll be able to remember that failing is as important as succeeding when you're trying to build a dream.

Ever forward.

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